Having to Hear Something you Just Don't Want to Hear

Having to Hear Something you Just Don't Want to Hear

 

At different points in my past I had been in situations where friends and family would tell me things that I didn't want to hear. Fast forward to many months later and once out of that situation, I understood what they once tried to tell me. Now this has happened many, many times, and each time I learn something about myself. One big thing I learned, is that I needed to let people in my life who I trust to tell the truths they see that I choose to be blinded to and just don't wanna hear. Ask yourself, if I trust my friend and/or family with my deepest secrets and greatest moments in life, why not listen when to their concerns regarding you and your life. Why do those people all of the sudden become the "mind your business" people? Harsh questions indeed. It took me years to realize, learn and adjust and it'll probably take you just as long but it doesn’t have to. When we let emotions take over, which is what usually happens, you put blinders on.  When our egos are challenged, we get defensive. This applies to pretty much any issue you may be facing. Maybe you're involved in a bad relationship, live in a risky neighborhood or can but won't go for that promotion. Normal stuff! But how do we get a handle on it at a reasonable amount of time?

Step 1: Listen. No need to  respond. Hear out what your concerned loved one(s) is saying. Take notes. Ask questions for clarification. But, do not respond, justify or explain anything. It is not worth losing someone close to you for a temporary mishap.

Step 2: Strengthen your self awareness. Pay attention to those red flags your loved one(s) is concerned about. Now, there's a difference between going out of your way looking for something, than just paying closer attention to your surroundings. Do this for a couple of weeks. Journaling is a great way to keep thoughts and situations(if any) straight.

Step 3: Compare your friends/family's concerns with your own higher self-awareness experience(s) with or in, your situation. Do you see any red flags? If No, you don't owe an explanation to anyone.

If yes:

Step 4: Call it out! What are the red flags you saw? Make a list. Determine how bad they are and if there are achievable solutions. Write everything down. I promise you'll find this helpful at the end.

If there's hope:

Step 5: Prepare and make the first move towards change. Whether it is to have a conversation with a person (significant other, friend, boss, etc) or move to a new residence or going for the promotion.

Listen. Become Aware. Identify Problem & Solutions. Act.

 
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